Desire is a dangerous word.
What emotions do you feel when you hear the word “desire?” Do you feel anticipation, joy, or delight? Or do you feel apprehension, fear, or maybe even aversion or dread?
If you’re like most women, you’re not entirely comfortable with the word desire, especially in this unprecedented and unpredictable season we’re living through now.
Your world may have been reduced to the confines of your home, and thinking about what you desire or want may seem frivolous — or even useless.
But that’s a story, like so many other stories, women tell themselves about why they can’t have what they want. Or worse, they’ve decided that it’s pointless to pay attention to their desires, keeping them locked away and hidden.
These dreams must see the light of day — for the sake of the woman they belong to, and the world.
I hold a vision of women emancipating this powerful word from its usual associations focused narrowly on the physical body, sex, or lust.
Desire — in its most elevated and expansive meaning — must be returned to its rightful place in a woman’s heart and soul.
Your desires may be just below the surface, or they may be submerged a little deeper in your subconscious. Or maybe they have disappeared into the deepest part of the dark ocean of your awareness, weighted down by discouragement, disappointment, or even abuse.
But they are there.
Sometimes desires bubble up to the surface and invite your attention. Sometimes when they’ve been submerged too long they suddenly and unexpectedly flare with a vengeance. They may come out sideways as envy, hatred, jealousy, comparing yourself to someone you admire, or even as rage.
It doesn’t have to be that way.
Your desires — however small or grand — are vital. They are vital to you, and they are vital to the world. We need your desires now more than ever.
I invite you to close your eyes for just 15 seconds and courageously ask yourself, “What do I desire?” You may be surprised by what you hear.
When you ask what you desire, you may hear, “I want to quit my job and stay home with my children,” or, “I want to be a photographer for National Geographic,” or, “I want more alone time,” or “I want to solve climate change,” or, “I want to have a baby,” or, “I want to write a book.”
The beauty of stating desires is that they are always right. Every time.
Sadly, when a woman tells herself the truth about what she desires, another voice often chimes in. This voice is not her authentic self, but it is loud and persistent. It replies with some version of, “That’s stupid,” or, “You can’t have that,” or, “Yeah, you already tried that, and it didn’t work out. Why don’t you just give up?”
Can you feel the pain and disappointment in these words? They are toxic desire-killers, and most of us are intimately familiar with them.
Unacknowledged and unexpressed desires are a tried and true recipe for pain, disappointment, and bitterness. Conscious desires — on the other hand — sometimes result in receiving far and beyond what you thought was possible.
If you struggle to know what you want, or to identify what you desire, or if you consistently discount or talk yourself out of what you know you would love, there are specific practices and actions you can take to discover your authentic desires, honor yourself, and become your fiercest ally.
The path from wounding to wholeness begins with each woman returning to her authentic self, reclaiming her truth, and opening to receive what is meant for her.
I call this journey The Radiant Threefold Path of Return+Reclaim+Receive.
The journey starts with knowing exactly who you are — body, mind and soul. Returning to you is the essential first step toward realizing your dreams and desires.
When you reclaim your authentic feminine nature, you stand for yourself by becoming your fiercest ally and most loyal protector. When you express your authentic truth, you become magnetic — inviting everything to you that is meant for you.
Receiving is the essence of feminine power. Receiving begins with taking empowered ownership of your happiness, and realizing the power you already have to manifest the desires of your heart. And from this place of abundance, you offer your unique gifts to the world — radiantly empowered.
The Radiant Threefold Path invites every woman into a process of returning to the truth of her authentic self, knowing and claiming her desires, and receiving — the essence of feminine power.
In my next post I’ll share how you can begin excavating and uncovering your truth, your hidden desires, and the path that leads to you, radiantly empowered. I’ll also be sharing some exciting news about a brand new opportunity to work directly with me on a journey through the Radiant Threefold Path!
© Vicki Tidwell Palmer (2020)